Wednesday, April 16, 2008

A new installment of "my kid pukes SO much"

So, some of you that have known me online and in real life for awhile, particularly those few unfortunate souls who have had the displeasure of witnessing this phenomenon firsthand, know that my Pork Chop has a sensitive gag reflex (ok, this was posted first to my myspace blog, in which I actually have more than like 2 people read lol so that first part was obviously addressed to them, some of these poor people have heard many tales very similar to the scenario you are about to read about). He will say this himself, to anyone that will listen. In other words, this kid pukes like you wouldn't believe. In the past, it has had the tendency to come and go in spurts, and would happen very often in restaurants....on tables, on the floor in front of strangers tables, from one side of the restaurant all the way to the bathroom - there was a time when we thought we would either be banned from Outback Steakhouse, or made to work there because of the amout of t-shirts they had given us on different ocassions for our poor little puker to wear after he ruined his clothes. Ok, enough reminiscing....on with the story. He has gotten so much better about it, and the frequency has reduced, and it's been a long time since it has happened. Well, he broke his no-puke streak last night. Around midnight, I heard him cough once, and I didn't think anything of it (though in the past, I would have thought "oh shit, here it comes" coz it always started with a cough.....). A few minutes later, he comes out to the living room to inform us that he puked everywhere. And I look more closely at him, and it is everywhere. All over his shirt, face, arms, shorts, legs. I didn't even want to see his room. So GI Joe sent him off to the shower, and we go to survey the damage. I gagged about 2 steps into the room. See, since I was pregnant with G, puke is one thing I just can't deal with anymore. I myself developed quite a sensitive gag reflex when I was pregnant with her, and it was smells that set me off. So, I left the room, and set about finding some means to protect myself from the offending odor. I saw an Old Navy sweatshirt, toddler size, n my dresser, and grabbed it up, folded it just so, and tied that bitch around my face. I have pictures to prove it, but unfortunately my USB cable is in G's room, and she is asleep. He had puked on the wall, all over his comforter and stuffed animals, on the sheets. It was horrible, and it reeked of spoiled milk and chocolate. I recalled a few minutes later that he had hot chocolate before bed. Ew. And before that, we had Mexican food. Double ew. It was awful. It took me 2 loads of laundry to get it all washed. And there were a few stuffed animals that did not make it out of that battle alive. One of which he was very upset about losing, so I searched for it on amazon and already ordered it for the poor kid. Some Ty fish thing. I could go on and on about the horribleness and disgustingness of the whole episode, but hey, I'm sure you've read more than enough :P

1 comment:

Mo said...

My 3 year old puked in the middle of the night on vacation at the in-laws' house a few weeks back. At least he made it to the bathroom.
I share your amazement at the copious amounts of vomit and force one small child can produce. It's like he painted every available surface with the stuff. Strangely enough we'd also had mexican food that night. I empathize with your smell situation fo sho.
But my FIL cleaned it up for me, so, uh, hope you had fun with that ;)